Middle Childhood (9-11 years of age)

Developmental Milestones

Children start growing independence from their family and interest in friends might quite obvious during this period of their life. Having healthy friendships are very important to your their development, but peer pressure can become quite strong during this time. Children who feel good about themselves are more able to resist negative peer pressure and make better choices. That is why this is a crucial time for children to gain a sense of responsibility along with their growing independence with school and house chores. Also, physical changes of puberty might be showing by now, especially for girls. Another big change children need to prepare for during this time is starting middle or junior high school and in Japan testing and working through the stress of testing is a very important part of their development.

How children develop during middle childhood:

Emotional/Social Changes

Children might:

• Start to form stronger, more strong friendships and peer relationships. It becomes more emotionally important to have friends, especially of the same sex.

• Experience more peer pressure, especially if they can not keep up with their peers.

• Become much more aware of their body as puberty approaches. Body image and eating problems sometimes start around this age.

Thinking and Learning

Children might:

• Face more academic challenges at school.

• Become more independent from family.

• Begin to see the point of view of others more clearly or start to understand others also have an opinion.

• Have an increased attention span.

Positive Parenting Tips

Following are some things you, as a parent, can do to help your child during this time:

• Spend time with your child. Talk with them about their friends, their accomplishments, and what challenges she will face.

• Be involved with your child’s school. Go to school events; meet your child’s teachers.

• Encourage your child to join school and community groups, such as a sports team, or to be a volunteer for a charity.

• Help your child develop their own sense of right and wrong. Talk with him about risky things friends might pressure them to do, like smoking or dangerous physical dares.

• Help your child develop a sense of responsibility—involve your child in household tasks like cleaning and cooking. Talk with your child about saving and spending money wisely.

• Meet the families of your child’s friends.

• Talk with your child about respecting others. Encourage them to help people in need. Talk with them about what to do when others are not kind or are disrespectful.

• Help your child set their own goals. Encourage them to think about skills and abilities he would like to have and about how to develop them.

• Make clear rules and stick to them. Talk with your child about what you expect from their (behavior) when no adults are present. If you provide reasons for rules, it will help their to know what to do in most situations.

• Use discipline to guide and protect your child, instead of punishment to shame them.

• When using praise, help your child think about their own accomplishments. Saying “you must be proud of yourself” rather than simply “I’m proud of you” can encourage your child to make good choices when nobody is around to praise them.

• Talk with your child about the normal physical and emotional changes of puberty.

• Encourage your child to read every day. Talk with them about their homework.

• Be affectionate and honest with your child, and do things together as a family.

Healthy Bodies

• Provide a vast amount of fruits and vegetables; limit foods high in solid fats, added sugars, or salt, and prepare healthier foods for family meals. However, sometimes it might be difficult

• Keep television sets out of your child’s bedroom. Set limits for screen time and develop a media use plan for your family.

• Encourage your child to participate in an hour a day of physical activities that are age appropriate and enjoyable and that offer variety! Just make sure your child is doing three types of activity: aerobic activity like running, muscle strengthening like climbing, and bone strengthening – like jumping rope – at least three days per week.

• Make sure your child gets the recommended amount of sleep each night: For school-age children 6-12 years, 9–12 hours per 24 hours (including naps)